Becoming a Christian.

I think I'd like to write about a topic that I haven't really mentioned on my blog. Last August, when I met Matthew, I was not a Christian. I was pretty much anti-religion, and I had been for a long time. Religion, and God, was not really my thing. But then after meeting Matthew, I admired his love for Jesus. His love for Jesus radiates from him. At first I was nervous about dating someone who was so hardcore Christian. I was afraid he was going to preach 24/7 and try to shove Christianity down my throat like so many others had before.

Then, one weekend I went back up to Kansas City. I found the Bible that I had bought last spring. I recently had read some books about Christianity. First I read Heaven Is For Real, and then I read Blue Like Jazz. These two books had really gotten my thoughts going. I asked Matthew what book in the Bible I should read, just out of my own curiosity. He suggested Romans.

I got about half way through Romans, and I couldn't focus anymore. All I could think about was the Book of Matthew. I believe it was partly because of Blue Like Jazz. In the book, anyone who had become a Christian had started with reading Matthew. I was texting Matt, and I told him that I couldn't focus on Romans and kept thinking about Matthew. He told me to give up on Romans and to switch to Matthew. So I did. Looking back, I wonder if it was actually Blue Like Jazz that lead me to the Book of Matthew, or if it was the guidance of God. It may have been both. 

For those of you who have never read Matthew, it covers some of the life of Jesus and his crucifixion. About half way through the book, I realized that I was not reading just read anymore. I was reading to learn. I fully believed in everything that I had just read. Matt texted me and asked me how it was going. Once I was finished, I texted him back and told him that I believed in Jesus, and that I believed that He had died for me. 

Matt asked me, "Who is Jesus to you?" I responded, "He is my Savior and He died for my sins." I had no idea where that answer had come from. In Heaven Is For Real, the father would be asked questions that he didn't know the answer to. However, he could give the perfect answer to these people. He stated that these answers just came to him - that they had come to him from God. I felt this same sensation when I was talking to Matt about it. Saying "He is my Savior and He died for my sins" was not something that I would have ever said prior to that night. But that answer was so perfect, and I knew that it was true. 

I can't even describe what I felt like. One of the campus ministries, Cru, made videos about the Before and After. Before, without even knowing it, I was so lost and so empty. I suddenly had purpose to my life. I realized that I was never alone, and that I had someone so amazing to lean on. It made me wish that I had believed in God when my parents got divorced. Having that rock to stand on would have been very helpful. 

Ever since that night, I have been moving forward in my journey with God. I've learned an amazing amount about God, and I learn something new every day. Talking about it with Matthew is one of my favorite things to do. I also love talking to Matthew about what his parents are doing. I think it's amazing work. 

Becoming a Christian has literally changed my life. It has helped me become a much better person, in every aspect. Of course, I'm still working on many areas, but that will always be an ongoing process. Becoming a Christian has even changed what I want to do with my career. Not only do I want to own a not-for-profit organization that helps those who just got out of prison get back on their feet, but I want my organization to be Christian based. I believe it's what I'm meant to do, and I know that faith based organizations are far more successful than non-faith based. 

Becoming a Christian has been the best thing to ever happen to me.