The size of my heart.

They say that your heart is the size of your fist. Well, then mine must not be very big. But at the same time, it's endless. Before I met Matthew, I had been saying for three years that I was never getting married. Watching my parents go through a divorce had really just ruined the thought of marriage for me. I thought, "Why put myself through that? I may trust them now, and I may love them now, but who's to say I will feel the same way in 20 years?"

Then I met Matthew. And everything changed. I wanted nothing more than to spend the rest of my life with him. It was literally a moment of "when you know, you know". I can't think of any other way to describe it. Yes, I still stop and think sometimes about what the future holds for us. But I believe that God brought us together for a purpose. We were meant to be together. And I know that we can make it through anything and everything.

But what's even better is that I'm gaining a whole other family. Something that I had come to accept was that I'd never be an aunt. Which devastated me. Growing up in a huge family, I wanted nothing more than to be an aunt. Everyone in my family had a sibling, except for me. I'd never be an aunt. As I entered college, I had several friends who became aunts, and they loved it more than anything. I was so jealous.

And now, here I am. Just over one month away from becoming an aunt. I can't even describe what emotion that brings me. I never knew that I could love so many people as if they were my own blood relatives. Matt's sisters are my sisters. I love them more than anything and I would do anything for them. I have yet to meet Matt's brother (besides talking to him via headset while playing Call of Duty), and I already love him too. And I love his wife and his daughter. I've known Matthew's family for less than a year, and I already love them enough to fill the time from when we were all born.

Physical size of hearts don't matter when it comes to love. Love has no boundaries. It's surprising and it'll hit you when you least expect it. But when it does, it's a beautiful thing.

And I thank God every single day for the wonderful people He has put into my life. I will never be grateful enough.

When God's in your dreams.

Themes. I've noticed a theme in my life recently.

When I was talking to Matthew about feeling a call into missions, the main thing I kept saying was that I didn't feel qualified. I mean, let's be honest. I'm still a new Christian. August/September will be my one year mark (already!?). How could I be qualified to go out and share His Word? I still feel like I don't know anything! Matt told me it didn't matter.

I thought back to when Sarah suggested I read Exodus 3 and 4. It's about when Moses told God that he should choose someone else because he wasn't qualified. But God basically told him, "Hey. I made you. I know what you can do, and I'm going to be with you the whole time." (of course, it's a little more eloquent in the Bible, but hey, it's fine.) Moses told God that he was slow to speak and that he shouldn't be the one. But God chose him.

Then, the other night, I had a dream. I have absolutely NO idea what the dream was about, but I know that when I woke up, I had one word on my mind - Jeremiah. I couldn't stop thinking about that name. I mean, what the heck? I don't know anyone by that name. Finally, I decided to check the Bible. WELL, HELLO! There was my answer. The Book of Jeremiah. (Which I had no idea exists)

------------------------------------

Jeremiah 1:4-8

The word of the Lord came to me, saying,
"Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you,
before you were born I set you apart;
I appointed you as a prophet to the nations."
"Alas, Sovereign Lord," I said, "I do not know how to speak. I am too young."

But the Lord said to me, "Do not say, 'I am too young.' You must go to everyone I send you to and say whatever I command you. Do not be afraid of them, for I am with you and will rescue you," declares the Lord.

---------------------------------------

Are you seeing the same message/theme I am? I may not believe that I am qualified enough, but I have God behind me. That makes me unstoppable. It's a big step in my faith, but I'm more than ready to take it. I will let God take control and completely guide me. I'm very interested in going into missions, even though I don't know that much about it. But I'm taking my steps towards that, and I know it will all work in the end to glorify God.

One last tid-bit. Sarah told me a quote yesterday when we were having our wonderful life talk:

"God doesn't call the qualified; God qualifies the called."

Oops... I dropped a class.

Last night, I dropped one of my summer classes. It was so difficult for me to do. I felt like I was such a quitter, and I hate that feeling. But after a long conversation with Matthew, I went ahead and dropped out of it. Although it sucks that we'll be out the money for that course, it will be worth it to not have a bad grade and not have the stress about the course.

I didn't do well on the first quiz at all (and by not doing well, I mean a 55%). I had no desire to put a lot of effort into the class, and that really just stressed me out. Finally, I sat down with Matt and showed him my schedule I had created for the summer, fall, and spring. I only had 12 hours in the spring, and I said that I could get rid of 3 this summer and add it into the spring to make it 15 hours. 15 hours isn't a big deal at all. I've handled 18 before, so it wouldn't be that stressful. Matt told me to do whatever I wanted and that he'd support me 100% no matter what. (One of the reasons I seriously love him).

On a happier note, I got to meet Sarah's pig Penny yesterday!

 

 

Is she not just so precious? I can't say that I would ever think of pigs as pets, but OH MY GOSH. I love her. I'm actually pretty jealous of Sarah for having Penny. Penny fell asleep in my lap yesterday, and it was just too darn cute. I found out that pigs are actually fiercely loyal pets and they are incredibly smart. Who would have thought?

 



What a week it's been.

I suppose we could play some catch up really quick. I have yet to blog about last weekend.

The family reunion on Saturday was awesome! It was so great to see so many of my family members that I haven't seen in forever. My family is so big! (& so old) One of my favorite parts was that my grandma had several photo albums that all had really old pictures in them. She told us to go through them and that we could take any pictures that we wanted. So I took three. One has my great grandfather, Gramps in it. He looked spiffy. Another had my grandfather when he was younger, and another had him and my uncle Chap and my uncle Jack. They're awesome pictures.

After that we went to Matt's parents house and hung out there. After we took Kira to work, we played Ticket to Ride with his dad and his youngest sister Annika. I had never played before, but it was fun! Then we picked up Leah from work and then just went home and crashed.

Sunday we got up and went to church and then went back and his dad cooked us some delicious steaks! We got to meet Leah's new boyfriend Zach, too! It was fun. All in all, it was a great weekend.

Monday was relatively uneventful.

Yesterday was a great day though! I had Panera twice (once for lunch and then again for dinner). But I wasn't even mad. It's SO good. For lunch, I saw my cousin Jordan and her wonderful mother. It was a great lunch. Jordan will be coming down to Springfield for college in the fall and I cannot wait for her to be down here! It's going to be so fun. We also talked about faith, which is always amazing. My dinner date was my Soar Mama, Abi. It's always a pleasure to meet with her. (& she was so understanding when I was ten minutes late). We talked for forever and didn't leave Panera until about 9. We had lots of amazing conversation. We also had a lot of catching up to do. I don't know why we always wait a loooong time before we finally get together. But hey, we're adults and these things happen.

And that, my friends, gets you all caught up. So yay!

I have started a new book though. It's called Humility by C.J. Mahaney. I'm only a few chapters in, but I really like it so far. You know, I don't think I've read a book about Christianity yet that I haven't liked. I believe this one is super important. Humility and humbleness are so important and can really grab the attention of God. This book discusses that and discusses ways that one can work towards being more humble.

 

I've also been reading my Bible more. I've realized that I've really let life get in the way of things with God. I've also been having dreams pointing me towards the Bible and certain passages have been making an appearance in my life recently. For example, the story of Moses. It keeps popping up. It started with Sarah as a way to help me feel less lost and it happened again the other night. I was randomly fanning pages in my Bible while talking to Matthew and I let it fall open. It landed on the exact verses that Sarah had told me to look at a few days prior. Try and tell me that's not a sign. So I'm working my way through the story of Moses.

 

One thing I did NOT know was that Moses was a murderer. He killed a man and God still had a big plan for him and talked to Moses personally. This really just stuck out to me. So many people will say they are too far gone for Christianity. But THAT'S NOT TRUE. God loves everybody. Which is such great news.

 

Also, history was made today! DOMA was shot down by the Supreme Court. This makes it to where all same-sex married couples get all the same benefits as straight married couples. Talk about a step in the right direction! I'm glad that I'll be on the right side of history.

 

Not all who wander are lost.

Remember that time I talked about feeling really lost? If you don't... here's the link --> click!

On the drive back today from KC (side note: we had an amazing weekend.) I had a really long talk with Matthew about how I've been feeling lately. It's a really hard feeling to describe, but I feel as if I have this invisible string tied around my waist that's pulling me somewhere. Except I have no idea where. 

Lately I've just really felt that Springfield is not the place I need to be. I can feel that God is calling me to do something bigger. Only problem is that I don't know what or where. I know that I'm meant to help people. I can feel that. I've really been struggling with this lately, and I haven't really mentioned it to Matt. 

One reason I mentioned it is because it's starting  to show in my school work. I'm doing fine in my psychology class, but I've really been struggling to find motivation for my criminology class. I think in part it's because I'm not sure if I want to be a probation officer or anything like that anymore. 

Something that has really caught my attention lately is missionary work. Which throws me for a loop! If you had asked me a year ago if I would consider to be a missionary I would have laughed in your face. But lately, it's been something that I'm really drawn to. I have no idea why. It's not something I've ever thought of doing. But there's something just drawing me towards it.

I really want to take a break from school. As I said before, I can feel that Springfield is not the place I need to be. But I'm so close to my degree, I feel obligated to stay here. 

 In light of this struggle, I'm going to take a few steps to try and find clarity. I'm going to try and find a place down here to volunteer to fill my desire of helping people. I have a couple ideas, and I'm going to ask around for some more ideas. I'm also thinking of trying a fast that is geared toward clarity. That's something I've never done before, and I think it could be a big step for my faith. Matthew and I are also going to try and find a church that fits us and that we could be involved with long term. 

I'm hoping I can figure out what my true calling is. I trust in God to lead me down the right path. It's a matter of trying to be patient. Which we know I'm not very good at. 

If you have any advice, feel free to share it. I'll gladly accept it. :)

Date Nights are the Best Nights.

Yesterday was a wonderful kind of day. I did some homework, but other than that was pretty lazy for most of the day. I mean, who doesn't love days like that? I did get to see some wonderful friends yesterday evening. Sarah, Danielle, and I went to Cold Stone Creamery for some ice cream after Sarah got off work. Sarah and I had never been there. (I did find out that Tuesdays are bogo. Looks like I know where I'll be on Tuesdays, ha). After receiving our delicious ice cream we went back to Sarah's to hang around and chit chat. Shortly after getting there Erica showed up! I haven't seen her in so long and she just got back from Kenya. It was great to see her.

I left Sarah's and went home to meet Matt. He had agreed to take me to see Monster's University. I cannot even tell you how excited I was! Since he had just gotten off work and showered, he was really hungry. So I suggested we make it a date night and get dinner before our movie. So we went to 5 Spice! It's the first time I've been there since I quit. I had to admit, it was kind of awkward.. but the food was delicious!

Matt never thinks about the fact that I almost always post my pictures on Facebook ;) Doesn't he look so adorable? After we finished eating, we went to the movie theater. We were pretty early to the 10:35 showing, so we got to just hang around. Holy moly, there were a TON of high schoolers. Anyway, I was so excited for the movie to start. But before it did there was the cutest of all short films.

 It literally had all the women/girls in the theatre saying "AWWWW!" I was okay with the movie being delayed a few minutes for this short. It was too cute. But finally, FINALLY, Monster's University started!

Eeee! I was literally so excited I was bouncing up and down in my seat. The other people in the theatre probably thought I was nuts. But I didn't even care. Thank goodness I didn't have to go to the bathroom in the middle of this, because every second was gold. I honestly believe that this movie was better than the original. Of course, the first will always hold a special place in this little heart of mine, but OH MY WORD. I couldn't stop talking about how good it was. Right up until we went to sleep, I was going on and on about it. It was that good.

It totally explained any questions you ever had! For example, you find out why Randall hates Sully so much. This may sound super cheesy (as most of my posts do), but it was so awesome to watch Mike & Sully grow as characters throughout the movie.

One last sentiment about this movie... MIKE AS A LITTLE KID IS THE CUTEST THING POSSIBLE. Oh Em Gee. I basically started hyperventilating when little Mike came on screen. Seriously. He was adorable.

If you liked Monster's Inc., you HAVE to go see Monster's U. ASAP. I kind of want to go see it again. Is it out on DVD yet?

Life isn't always fair.

Boy, that sure is one hard lesson to learn. I fear that I may never fully be able to accept that life just isn't fair. I know that in the end, it will all be okay because I have God on my side. But goodness gracious am I frustrated today!

I can't post too many details on here for fear that I may hurt someone else's feelings, but I must say that it's hard not to post the whole situation. Remember my previous post about my tattoos? (If you didn't read it, here's the link --> Let's Play Catch Up ). I got singled out. Embarrassed. And yet, I dress so professional and modestly. I've really been struggling lately with dealing with how people address my clothing and my tattoos in comparison with other's.

I know that's pretty vague, but it's probably still even too much. I know that I can't control the "rules" and "policies", but I do believe that rules and policies should  be created to harbor a fair environment.

But hey. If that's one of my biggest struggles of the moment, then I'd have to say that I'm pretty darn lucky. I'll take it.

I have an app on my phone that gives me a daily Bible verse (you know, cause there's an app for everything). Today's verse really has helped me in light of my being frustrated.

Psalm 18:1-2
I love you, O Lord, my strength. The Lord is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer, my God, my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield, and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.

Yup, just the reminder I needed today!

Order, Order!

Last night Matthew and I ordered our wedding bands! Yippee! I'm sooo excited to get them, I can hardly contain it. The only bad part is the waiting to wear them part. I mean, once we get them, I just want to be married and be able to wear them! But alas, we will wait. I mean, the wedding is only 45 days away! Eeeek!

I feel like so much has been done, but there's still so much to do! I'm not much of a details person though, so I'm just kind of floating along. There's only a couple more things to crunch out. Just about everything is falling into place!

I can't wait to marry my best friend. August 3rd can't come soon enough!

Mishaps in the Kitchen.

I made the salsa mentioned in the previous blog. It turned out very yummy, but I had a VERY scary moment while making it. First, here's a picture of my salsa (in our new glass tupperware from Sammie). 

 Looks yummy, right? It is. But I'm not so sure if it was worth it. Let's just say that next time... Matthew will be making it. 

After chopping up the jalapeno, I was  adding some other ingredients. Well, without thinking about it.. I scratched my eye. OH MY HOLY WORD. There aren't words to describe how much it hurt. I ran to the bathroom to flush out my eye. Well then... IT SPREAD TO MY OTHER EYE. Within 30 seconds, both eyes were consumed and burning. I literally thought I was going to go blind. I couldn't open my eyes at all. I washed my hand with soap to get the remaining jalapeno juice off and then continued flushing my eye out. As soon as I could somewhat open my eyes, I ran to the kitchen, grabbed my phone and a casserole dish and ran back to the bathroom. I filled the dish with cold water and started dunking my head in the water and opening my eyes. The burning had spread to my entire face by that point. In between dunks, I called my mom. She then called my grandma to ask her if there was anything I could do.

Finally, after about 10-15 minutes of extreme pain, the burning subsided. But I literally thought I was going to be blind. Part of the super scary part was that I was home alone. I can't say that I've been that scared in a REALLY long time. It was so incredibly painful.

My mom called me back and told me my grandpa had looked it up. He said that it was more painful than dangerous. Jalapeno juice in your eye is comparable to being pepper sprayed. It's that painful. So now I get to spend my night with a cold wash cloth to sooth my now irritated face and I get to put eye drops in my eyes. WONDERFUL.

What did I learn today?

-Never touch your eyes after touching jalapenos.
-Moms and grandparents are so helpful and know just about everything.
-Being home alone thinking you're going blind is so scary it's not even funny.
-Blender salsa is DELICIOUS.

Adventures in Home Cooking.

Usually, Matthew does most of the cooking. But now that I have all day Tuesday and Thursday off, I figured I can start working on new recipes! Today, I'm trying three - you read that right, THREE - new recipes, all of which I found on Pinterest. 

The recipe I'm probably most excited about is a crock pot recipe. One of our many awesome gifts from the bridal shower was a super sweet crock pot (given by my wonderful mother). I've been dying to use it, so I found a recipe. I did have friends give me some via Facebook. For those of you who did that, no worries, I've written them down and will try them soon! Today's crock pot recipe is Crock Pot Ranch Potatoes. Does that not sound delish? 

To save space, here's a link to the recipe --> click! The second recipe I'm trying is for our main dish. It's called Baked "Fried" Chicken. 

Looks soooo yummy. Again, to save space, here's the link! --> click! And the third recipe is for Blender Salsa! (side note: my kitty is sleeping next to me, and she's snoring. It's probably the cutest thing ever)

I'm pretttty excited about it. I know some of my family members have tried this, and it looks and sounds scrumptious. The only thing I may not like very much is that it's not chunky. I love my chunky salsa. Since we're on the topic of new recipes, I'll post another one that Matt and I will try out here pretty soon.

The Taco Braid! Here's the recipe --> click! I really like the blog post about this that the woman did. She has step by step pictures and makes it super east. I think it's going to be absolutely delicious! 

Man, now I'm positively starving! I may have to go enjoy a snack. Or maybe I'll just whip up that salsa and eat some of it. Then I'll play Animal Crossing :) In case you were wondering - I'm still so in love with that game. It's da bomb! 

Favorite Songs of the Moment.

Work is kind of slow at the moment, and I'm all school work-ed out. So I figured I could pass some time with a musical kind of blog post. I believe that music is very important because it can sometimes say the words that you cannot.

This is Hush Hush by the Pistol Annies. For some reason, I just really find this song catchy.

This is Runnin' Out of Moonlight by Randy Houser. Definitely a good song to roll your windows down and cruise to. At least, that's what I do anyway.

This video is Blessings by Laura Story. I originally heard it on 88.3 The Wind (great radio station, btw). It's such a great song that always comes on right when I need to hear it.

I listen to Wanna Dance with Somebody at work all the time. I'm pretty sure everyone thinks I'm absolutely nuts for dancing at the front desk, but you know what? I don't care. I enjoy music and I love what it brings out in people.

Well, there's four of my favorites right now. There's tons more, but I don't have the space and you don't have the time. :)


Also, if you have any super awesome crockpot recipes, you should leave them in the comments below. I want to try one tomorrow and I have no idea what to cook!

Craig's List Adventures

Well, our first ever adventure with Craig's List was a success! We met with the guy this morning and got my game! I was so excited that I went home and started playing it. It's just as great as I remembered it!

I have to say, I was so nervous to use Craig's List. I've always thought it was so sketchy. But honestly, it wasn't that bad! I mean, I would never meet anyone by myself, but I'd do it again if I ever needed anything. It was pretty dang easy.

Once I got home, I set up the Gamecube. To my surprise, I found a game in there! Oops. I don't think that Vintage Stock knew it was in there. It was Mario Kart: Double Dash. I've never played it before, but it was a nice surprise! Looks like we'll need to buy a second controller ;)

Flea Market Hunting & Other Shenanigans.

Today was a very eventful day! Matthew and I literally went from one corner of Springfield to the other. But it was so fun! 

First we went to a flea market off Trafficway. Honestly, I couldn't tell you the name of it. But we found some super awesome tables there! They're originally from Pier 1 Imports. We got them for $30! What a steal, right?

We're gonna paint the smallest one and the biggest one red and then the middle one black. It's gonna be super cute! After that flea market we went to Vendor's Mart over on Glenstone. We found a table to put in front of our bed. We're going to paint it black and do the trim red. Here's that table:

We got that awesome table for $12! Basically so awesome. I'm really excited about it! (If you can't tell). I wasn't read to end our adventures after Vendor's Mart, so we stopped at an antique place near Vendor's Mart. Buuuut... it was sketchy and there was SO MUCH stuff EVERYWHERE. We didn't stay there very long. After that I convinced Matt to go to Vintage Stock to look for a Gamecube and Animal Crossing. I used to play that game and I looooved it. So we bought a Gamecube. They didn't have the game there. 

 Since they didn't have the game there, we went to Game Stop, the other branch of Vintage Stock, and Entertainmart. NONE OF THEM HAD ANIMAL CROSSING. I was so upset. Since our search was over for the time being, we decided it was probably time for dinner. We went Ruby Tuesday. Here's some evidence in the form of their delicious biscuits:

 Those were delicious and our dinner was too! Our adventures of the day weren't quite over though. We then went Lowe's to buy paint for our new tables. At that point it started raining, and so we headed home. 

I was not about to accept defeat in not finding Animal Crossing, so I turned to the awesome internet. I searched Amazon, Ebay, and Craigslist. FINALLY, I found something on Craigslist. The seller was actually selling a bundle of 8 games (one of which was Animal Crossing) and some other stuff. They wanted $150 for it. Well, I didn't care about the other games. So I replied and told them I'd give them $15 for Animal Crossing and the memory card. AND THEY SAID YES! So Matthew and I are meeting them tomorrow morning to get my game. OH MY WORD, I can't tell you how excited I am.

As if our day wasn't full enough, I also did school work. I completed a pretest, post test, media assignment, and three chapter exams. HOLY MOLY. This was such a busy Sunday, but it was so awesome. I loved every second of it. Even the seconds where I was angry about not finding the game. Now though, I'm going to go enjoy a big bowl of ice cream! 

Creamy Lemon Chicken

I know I don't normally share this type of stuff with you guys, but I'm so excited to have this for dinner tonight! I've made it a few times, and it never disappoints!

Mine never looks quite as fancy as that.. BUT the idea is generally the same. I've made this for Matthew and my mom and my best friend Kristen. All have loved it. Kristen even used the recipe for her mother! I'm telling you... it's that good. And so easy. I found this on allrecipes.com. What's super awesome about this site is that you can search by ingredient! It's so easy and convenient. Matthew and I love it! Here's the recipe:

• 1/4 cup flour
• 4 boneless skinless chicken breasts
• 1 (18 ounce) can Progresso Recipe Starters creamy roasted garlic with chicken stock cooking sauce
• 3 table spoons lemon juice (I did 5 the second time I made it - yummy!)
• Salt & pepper

1. Between pieces of plastic wrap or waxed paper, place each chicken breast smooth side down; gently pound with flat side of meat mallet or rolling pin until about 1/2 inch thick. (Hitting the chicken is probably my favorite part - well, other than eating it anyway) In small shallow dish, mix flour with 1 teaspoon salt and 1/2 teaspoon pepper; dip each chicken breast into flour mixture, coating all sides.
2. In 10-inch skillet, heat 2 tablespoons vegetable oil over medium-high heat. Cook chicken breasts in oil 6 to 8 minutes, turning once, or until brown. In small bowl, mix cooking sauce and lemon juice.
3. Pour sauce mixture over chicken. Reduce heat to medium-low; simmer 5 to 10 minutes or until juice of chicken is clear when center of thickest part is cut (at least 165 degrees F).

The website says to serve with rice, but let's be honest. You can serve lemon chicken with just about anything! The first time I made it I served it with company potatoes and crescent rolls. This time I think we'll probably serve it with rice (which has become a very common side in our household, especially since we got our new rice cooker). YUM!

If you try this recipe out, let me know what you thought of it!

The Reason for God.

I started this book a while ago. At first, I wasn't sure if I was going to like it. I'd heard great things about the book and so I was willing to try it.

 

 

 

The book actually belongs to Matthew, but he let me write in it. He said it's a philosophical book so it's meant to be written in. Thank goodness, because I found a TON of stuff to underline and box.

 

The first quote I underlined in the book was this:

 

"What is religion then? It is a set of beliefs that explain what life is all about, who we are, and the most important things that human beings should spend their time doing."

 

Holy moly - what a statement! I think it is a wonderful definition of the word religion. So many people associate a God with the word religion, and that's not necessarily true. But I can definitely say that once I read that I knew I was going to love this book.

 

I just love the way this book is set up. Timothy Keller takes different arguments against Christianity and then explains why he believes those arguments are false. Each chapter is a new argument. For example, chapter one is called There Can't Be Just One True Religion; chapter two is called How Could a Good God Allow Suffering; chapter three is Christianity is a Straitjacket. (side note: Chapter 3 has probably been my favorite so far!)

 

Chapter three discusses love and restraint. I marked up SO much of that chapter. I would choose my favorite quote from the chapter, but I just can't! There's too many. And the one I would love to share with you is pretty long. Oh heck, I'll share it anyway!

 

"A friend of C.S. Lewis's was once asked, 'Is it easy to love God?' and he replied, 'It is easy to those who do it.' That is not as paradoxical as it sounds. When you fall deeply in love, you want to please the beloved. You don't wait for the person to ask you to do something for her. You eagerly research and learn every little thing that brings her pleasure. Then you get it for her, even if it costs you money or great inconvenience. 'Your wish is my command' you feel - and it doesn't feel oppressive at all. From the outside, bemused friends may think, 'She's leading him around by the nose' but from the inside it feels like heaven. For a Christian, it's the same with Jesus. The love of Christ constrains. Once you realize how Jesus changed for you and gave himself for you, you aren't afraid of giving up your freedom and therefore finding your freedom in him."

 

GAH - isn't that just amazing!? That's the last part of the chapter. I seriously just fell in love with this chapter. Definitely my favorite chapter so far!

 

If you are curious about Christianity or if you are a Christian, I suggest you check out this book. It's really great and has opened my eyes a lot. I think one of the reasons I find this book helpful to me is because before I was a Christian, I used a lot of these arguments to try to disprove Christianity. 

Peace.

This post will be rather short because I'm about to be off work, but I really just wanted to share this.

I posted a status about how I was feeling lost and one of my good friends texted me about it. She told me that she was praying for me and suggested I read Exodus 3 and 4, with an emphasis on Exodus 4:10-13.

HOLY MOLY. It brought such peace to me. I can't even describe it. It reinforced that God is in control and He definitely knows what He's doing.

My favorite part of her text was this: "Honestly, I think there is more security in not knowing God's plan because that means less of a chance of us messing it up!"

I never thought of it that way, and I totally dig it.

Anyway, I love have Godly friends. They definitely help me move forward and grow in my faith. LOVE LOVE LOVE IT.

That Lost Feeling.

Have you ever felt just lost? It's one of those feelings that can leave you feeling so helpless.

This is what I've been experiencing the last week or so.

I feel as if there is an invisible rope pulling me somewhere. I have no idea where or to what. It's almost frightening, but in a good sort of way. It makes me feel insecure, but excited at the same time. I swear, I've never felt anything like this before.

I've been praying a lot about it. So far, no clear cut answer has come forth, but I have faith that God will make His intentions clear. I just have to learn to be patient. (which we all know I'm HORRIBLE at)

I pray for clarity so that I know for sure that I'm walking in the path that God has laid for me. I may not know where I'm headed as of yet, but the answer will come! I have faith in Him to guide me through.

The Great Search for a New Name

I'm trying to figure out a new name for this blog. I've come up with a couple ideas, but I'm not sure they hit the mark. I want something that truly means something. I want it to be more personal. The best idea that I've had so far is "Confessions of a New Christian". But I just don't know...

Which is totally odd, because I'm not an indecisive person at all!  Do you have any ideas?

Future Friday.

The future has been a big topic between me and Matthew recently. A lot probably has to do with the fact that after August 3rd, we will be married. But it also has to do with the fact that I'm such a future planner.

Lots of changes will be happening soon. Lots of decisions have been made. As most of you know I am graduating a year early. So by this time next year I will have my bachelor's degree! I can't even begin to fathom that I'm almost done with college! I'm so very excited (I'm over going to class - haha). I think I've decided on what I want to do once I'm out of school, but I'm not 100% yet. I still have a couple years to decide.

Matthew has decided to take a break from school to re-evaluate where he's going in life. I support him 1000%. We will be in Springfield for probably another two years or more. Which is totally fine! I love this city. But sometimes I wish we lived in KC. But then again other times I wish we lived somewhere totally different. So who knows where we will end up.

Lately, I've been feeling very odd about my future career plans. I'm excited about them, but sometimes I feel like God is calling me to be somewhere else and do something else. But I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT. I've been feeling somewhat lost recently. I hope I get some clarity soon!

Beautiful Creatures

Okay, so I finally got to watch the movie Beautiful Creatures. This movie is based off a book, which I have read (a couple different times). 

Let's just say that I'm still trying to figure out how I feel about the film...

A while back I read the book. It's seriously so good. I loved the book. But then when I watched the movie.... it was TOTALLY different. The sequence was all wrong, they had removed several characters, they didn't show really important scenes, they revealed things all wrong. It was just wrong. The overall premise of the movie was right, but everything in between was just not like the book. AT ALL. 

With that said... it was a good movie. The movie was well made and it kept my attention. My only suggestion would be to see the movie and then read the book.


 

A Very Wonderful Bridal Shower.

This past Saturday was my bridal shower. Oh - my - WOW. I was so anxious all week for it to be the day because I just KNEW that it would be absolutely amazing. It's safe to say that I underestimated it! I was blown away. It was just another way that I was reminded how extremely blessed I am. I can't even tell you how many times I thanked God that day. Truly magical. 

Here's me and my mom! She's definitely one of my favorite people in my life. She does SO much for me. She's one of my best friends. We had a rough patch in our relationship for a while, but I am so thankful that we fixed everything. I'm proud of everything that my mother has become, and I hope I can be as wonderful of a mother as her some day. 

This is Kristen, my MOH. One of the best friends I've had. We've been really good friends for about a year or so now. I'm so thankful for her friendship. She's the most sarcastic person I know, and I love it. She's a hoot & a half! She's always there for me and she did such a great job helping plan my wonderful bridal shower. I know I can always count on this girl!

Here's two of my other best friends. Sammie & Sicily! I've been friends with Sicily for about 8 years or so. I can't believe it's already been that long! She's always been there for me, and she was my rock during my parent's divorce. I don't know what I would have done without her. I met Sammie a few years ago when I started working at Old Navy. The first thing she ever told me was that she had creeped me on Facebook. That was the start of a wonderful friendship. I love both of these girls so much.

One of the games that Kristen planned is pictured above. All the women split into three groups and, using toilet paper, had to design a wedding dress. These are the three results. Watching everyone construct these "dresses" was absolutely hilarious. After they were done I got to judge. They each did a cat walk and then I picked my favorite. Overall, here was my reaction: 

Let's just say that I thought it was pretty darn hilarious!

I know I've said this a BUNCH, but I am seriously so blessed with all the women who were able to make the shower. I can't be thankful enough! God has been very generous towards me. He is so wonderful!